Something I hope I never have to do:
This one is actually tough for me on a much deeper level. I feel like it forces you to think as morbidly as possible and considering I am not in the "brightest" spot in my life, you'd think that wouldn't be so hard. I obviously don't want to do things like bury my parents or a sibling- which is inevitable to some degree. SO for me to say I hope I NEVER have to do it is truth, yet also blatantly unrealistic. Those are obvious answers to the prompt and if I'm being "truthful" here, I think they are too easy. I don't want to die. Or lose someone close to me. Or even a pet. I don't want to have to shovel snow or mow my lawn. I hope I never have to do any of those things. But, I know I have to.
SO I made myself sit here. I forced myself to really think. What do I really truly hope I never have to do? I decided that I hope that I never ever have to go through anything like this again-namely I hope I never have to actually talk myself out of taking my life. EVER AGAIN. I will not allow myself to be so low. You shouldn't have to talk yourself into living.
So often people don't understand depression. I'll get questions like "what happened?" Honestly many times- nothing. No specific thing made me not want to get out of bed or made me unable to look at myself in the mirror. Sometimes it's lots of things. Other times it's nothing at all. There are good days and there are bad. I am taking one day at a time these days. I am going to work on me for a while-the right way. & I hope I never have to start at rock bottom again.